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It's a Komodo dragon at the St. They only grow to be about four and a half inches long, but their bite-size terror is potent -- they hide in the deep during the day, then rise up at night, returning once more to the abyss as day breaks. What looks like a half-done attempt to edit a utility pole out of a landscape is in fact the aftermath of a brush fire in Russia. Fill your aquarium with these fuckers and you'll fall asleep every night watching them silently proclaim your impending damnation. This too-out-of-place-to-be-true Santa is actually just a woman in costume and makeup if you look close, you can see where some rubbed off around her neck. Oil sheik Hamad bin Hamdan Al Nahyan of Abu Dhabi is the douchebag who paid to have his name etched into the sand so that it would be visible from space. What would your neighbor's place look like if it was sucked through a straw in the Looney Tunes universe. Nothing says prehistoric like blast-proof shielding. It's what would happen if natural disasters could bolt together Voltron-style. That's George, the 4-year-old Great Dane. But really, think for a minute.

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